OH wow

Got him!

5000 hits...?

5000....neat.

Detailed explanation of sex for the computer literate

Computer Sex

A detailed explanation of sex for the computer literate and real life illiterate.

Think of sex as a new protocol developed for real world communication and interaction between members of the opposite sex, much as TCP/IP allows all makes and models of computers to communicate and interface.

In this example, let's represent the woman as a Windows computer. A bit flighty, fun to look at, and occasionally does something useful. In the same way, the man will be represented as a DOS system. Not impressive looking, rough around the edges, but it can get the job done as long as you're patient.

Let's say the DOS system wants to interface with the Windows box. In this case, the two units could be in a crowded bar, represented here as a busy toking ring.

The DOS system attempts to open communication with a simple SMPT style message, in this case, HELLO. The Windows box generates a random number via an unknown internal process, and in some instances, responds with a similar HELLO message.

At other times, the Windows box fails to respond at all, either due to the initial HELLO message being lost in the network traffic, background noise, or due to internal conflicts in the Windows box's memory . In this case, let's assume the initial message was received and responded to.

The next step is a simple handshake in order to verify the connection, and to exchange hostnames and the real world version of IP addresses, known as phone numbers. These IP addresses allow later connections to be established quickly.

At this point, the two computers exchange lengthy information about themselves. In this example, the DOS system has very little system information to disclose, while the Windows box has a lengthy list of system and environment information. So our example would consist of lengthy information from the Windows box to the DOS system. The Windows box will occasionally pause to inquire about system information from the DOS system.

These inquiries also serve as keep alive messages, to ensure that the constant influx of information has not overflowed the limited memory of the DOS system and caused it to time out. The DOS system will then respond with a brief message, at which point, the Windows box is free to continue it's data transmission.

It is important to note that the DOS system must have a large amount of storage, as it will be expected to recall the transmitted information at a moment's notice, with no errors. Any errors will cause an abrupt end to communication for a period ranging from an hour or two to forever.

Let's assume that the initial handshaking and system information exchange proceed without incident, and no packet collisions (arguments) occur. The next step is a physical interface between the two computers. Usually, this is initiated by the DOS system.

The initial connection is known as a SMOOCH. (Simple Male Offering Of Carnal Happiness) Assuming the connection is accepted, it will be returned many times by the Windows box, to ensure that this critical signal is acknowledged. If it is not accepted, the Windowsbox will respond with a SLAP (Stop Leering and Pawing)

In the case of a SLAP message, the connection is abruptly closed -- Permanently !!!

In the case of a returned SMOOCH message, the two systems must be relocated to a private peer to peer network, where more secured communication will take place.

The first step is the removal of all encumbering software in order to ensure more fluid communication. The two systems then merge. There are several steps to this.

First, because both systems have been communicating freely for a while, appropriate anti-virus software must be used to ensure no infection of the opposite system. Once this software is installed, the DOS system mounts the Windows box's read-write. A high flow of data occurs, until the DOS box's buffers overflow, and the connection is terminated. (Note: The DOS system's buffer will not overflow as quickly if the speed of reading and writing is reduced. This allows a more prolonged communication.)

Finally, the DOS system unmounts. For some reason, the DOS system's hard drive has been transformed into a floppy at this point. We are still researching this phenomenon. Perhaps more robust systems will be able to maintain the hard drive status, but for now, this is beyond our reach.
At this point, the Windows box will attempt to reestablish low level communication, however, the DOS system is usually overloaded, and so within half an hour, both systems will enter a low power sleep mode.

via http://www.geekoftheday.com/geek-jokes/computer-sex.html

WTF video!!

There is a 100% chance that watching this video will make you say WTF. I also laughed my ass off.

Ticket for nothing!

So last night when I got home, I noticed that my mom's van was not in the driveway. I figured it just ment my mom was out shopping or something. I would have parked behind the other car, but now my mother leaves for work before I do. Thus, I parked on the street.

I've done it a million times before, but this morning was different.

I was about to leave for work, and lo and behold, a frikken ticket on my windshield! It's for a snow parking ban of some sort! I looked at the fee list, and now I have to fork over 30-40$ for NOTHING. There was no snow! There was no forecast for snow either!

I've seen people park on the streets in the winter all the time, and never noticed a ticket or anything!

Must have been a bored cop just strolling around at 4 am (time I got this BS ticket) and decided to screw with me. Grrr.

I'm going to try and fight this, but knowing the city it won't do much good.

We'll see what happens.

4000 views!

We're up to 4000 hits so far!

We also got a ad program into place finally. Hopefully it will add some major incentive for all of us!

Thanks for visiting! We'll be adding more in the coming weeks!

Sick of not being able to use the QUESTION MARK in Windows filenames?¿

If you're like me, you often go through many pictures, audio and video that has unique filenames describing the content of the file, and I am usually pissed when I cannot put a "?" at the end of the file and need to leave it as something like "Haddaway - What is love.mp3"

I have just found a character that's simply an upside down "?" and windows doesn't care! Now I can properly name my files.

To use it, just simply copy and paste this:    ¿    Or you can just hold down ALT and type the numbers 0191 and let go of ALT to put it in.


PS: Yes, we loflblog guys are still here, lofl. 3000 hits for the win!

Richard Dawkins - Enemies Of Reason Documentary

Yet another great documentary by one of my heros, Richard Dawkins. In this one, he tells how the countless number of superstitions and psudeo-sciences are far from just harmless fun. People are being horribly manipulated into thinking they're being made better from what is nothing more than a placebo effect. If anything, most of these things do nothing but help people make their wallets thinner.





Part 1

Part 2

The Boy With The Incredible Brain Documentary

This is the breathtaking story of Daniel Tammet. A twenty-something with extraordinary mental abilities, Daniel is one of the world’s few savants. He can do calculations to 100 decimal places in his head, and learn a language in a week. This documentary follows Daniel as he travels to America to meet the scientists who are convinced he may hold the key to unlocking similar abilities in everyone. He also meets the world’s most famous savant, the man who inspired Dustin Hoffman’s character in the Oscar winning film ‘Rain Man’.

View the video HERE.

The unseen things... or TUT

Walking down a dark hallway with but with candle in hand, you begin to understand why silence is such a beautiful thing. You stop and stand listening to the black nothingness that surrounds you. If you blow out the candle, and let the black void of space swallow you whole, then you will understand the reason of the light. For darkness is the absents of light, not the other way: no, never the other way. Every breathe, every beat of your heart, every little thing that lives in the four wall around you; no matter where the origin of the noise might have came from, they are different and yet somehow all the same. Somehow, somewhere, Meht came to be, Meht will watch and Meht will wait for us to fall and Meht will beat us while we curl up into a ball and cry over are things which matter not in the long run. But listen now even harder, a door ever so s-l-o-w-l-y opening up. The creaking of it is a sharp sword cutting down the silence in one swift stroke. Simple distance footsteps echo like a loin roar, and they grow louder with each moment you sit and listen: as you just sit and listen. From the sounds it seems like, there are more than just two legs walking to you, there is more pair of legs walking. You grab the matches from your pocket and striking the box, you relight the candle you see a single figure, it is man like, and there are two legs walking, but where are the other step coming from? Are they coming from behind the man-like creature, or behind your very self? Conjuring up all the courage inside you turn around to see-to your relief-no one. Your relief only lasts a moment though, for the silence you once found refuge in is now back, but you don’t feel any comfort from it. Turning around again you then see the man ascend it the air and begins come closer again with phantom footsteps being heard, but what makes the noise is not seen. Your mouth opens as you try to scream, but nothing comes out but silence as you start step backwards. Backing away you can’t unfix your eyes off the man as your candle light begins to reveal the truth of what he really is. The light has now showed you the truth, but you can’t expect what you see, it’s Meht. You keep repeating to yourself, “It’s not possible!” “No, no it can’t be Meht!” As you run there is an overwhelming sense of evil being projected from behind you. The steps speed up catching up to your own, and you push your body to it’s very limit to even try to escape from this, this evil, this fear, this thing which can’t be explained. Turning your head you see six large legs behind the man thick as pillars crushing the floor underneath them. Running faster down the black empty hallway Meht is now right behind you, a sharp pain begins to spread across your back, feeling with your hand and only to see your hand soak in blood. Wanting, longing, crying to just stop this endless pain of running you cry out. Again you feel the pain across your legs which now give out; tripping, falling, lying Meht stands over you now, the man sets himself on to the floor again and opens his eye. From his back two more arms appear and pull out a Zweihänder. As he raises it into air to perform the finishing move on your life, you feel a sense of hopelessness, and you close your eyes and now wait the blade to pierce your flesh. Again there is nothing but silence again, but out of the silence a voice speaks with a commanding tongue, “This is not the end!”